Honoring my donors

This is the message I posted on my GoFundMe page this morning and wanted to share the update here, too.

The Rife manufacturer was/is waiting on a part and I should be able to get the machine tomorrow. Wow. Seriously, I'm just amazed.

I've been contemplating ways of paying it forward, backward, up, down, and all around. One thing I know for sure is that I'll make mine available to people who need it or want to try it.

When I get the machine, the first thing I'm going to do is decorate it with the names of all of my donors. I want to consciously remember each one of you and send you blessings and healing of your own. Each time I use it, the radio waves will pass through your names and if you believe in the power of a name - well, all of you should be feeling surprisingly more healthy soon!

I've been doing more reading on Rife treatments for cancer and it's fascinating. I've sent an email to the manufacturer to see if those frequencies are covered in my machine and if they are - well, that's a freaking amazing power to possess and I'll definitely share it with people in the cancer community who need it or would like to try it.

My head is still spinning with gratitude. Photos to follow!!

A Fundraising Success Story - Already!!

I am flabergasted, pixilated with gratitude and wildly amazed at the response from so many of my beloved friends (and at least one person I've never met) who quickly contributed to my fundraising effort. I checked my GoFundMe website http://www.gofundme.com/Healing-Hearth-for-Willow just before writing this post and saw that I have already received $2200! I messaged the vendor yesterday and learned that I need exactly $2309 including taxes, so I'm buying my own Rife machine today. I still can't believe it. I'm not sure when I'll be able to pick it up. She wrote it would take a couple of days, but I'll find out for sure when I see her this afternoon for Rife treatment #6 ~ which will definitely be back down to the 3:33 time and we'll see if I get back to the old pattern: Rife day I'm wiped out, I herx for 2 days after that, then get a blast of energy the 4th day. I kind of liked that semi-dependable cycle so I could make plans with less flaking out.

Fundraising for myself is pushing a whole lot of my embarrassment buttons. Asking for help hasn't been my strong point historically, but financial help - well, there's some kind of unspoken taboo here, some sort of societal stench, or something I can't quite name. Perhaps I am afraid of appearing (or being, for that matter) desperate. I'm not sure what delightful lesson my shadow self has in store for me. I can tell something is trying to make its way from my subconscious to my conscious mind; an important lesson, memory or awareness bubbling up. Maybe its an outmoded defense response, a buried fear, a hidden wound, a self-defeating belief. As of yet, I do not know, but I'll open, listen and ask for dreams to show me the way.

I have come to adore shadow work. With Pluto in my first house, I've had to get used to it! This energy I'm experiencing, the button-pushing, triggering, uncomfortable squirm is like being at the beginning of a treasure hunt, already knowing there's an amazing reward and if I stick to the quest, I'll even get the treasure!! Now, who wouldn't want to embark on an exfrighting journey like that? Plunging into the deep, dark depths of my mind for a shining gem. Worth it!!

So dear ones, thanks for the money, the prayers, good wishes, love, and of course, thanks for the opportunity to do more shadow-stalking!! Bwaaaahaaa! I'll keep you posted if it's fit for public consumption - and maybe even if it isn't. Thanks again to all who support me in myriad ways. I love you and would be lost without you! Blessed Be!

P.S. The number of blog views from Latvia is increasing daily, more than doubling US hits today. What's up with that? If you are a reader from Latvia, please post a comment and let me and my readers know what's going on. I'm very curious.

Just for fun, here are this weeks stats as of now:

Latvia	115
United States	57
Canada	26
Germany	16
United Kingdom	5
Netherlands	4
China	3
Hong Kong	1
Russia	1

And, here are this months stats as of now:

United States	161
Latvia	115
Russia	52
Canada	48
Germany	19
United Kingdom	14
Serbia	14
Netherlands	10
Switzerland	6
Italy	4

30 Seconds = 3 days? Are you kidding me?

Well in case you've been wondering how Rife date #5 went, let's just say it's taken me a week to be able to get to the point of telling you how it went. Sigh... Oh, wait!  I mean *happy dance*! 

You know that pattern I mentioned a couple of posts ago? Well, I blew it. There's an old saying "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." I think the 3:33 timing of the previous couple of dates was the sweet spot, so to speak. It was enough to herx, but not herx-like-I-want-to-die herx. That has been the aim according to my MD and ND - treat just below that line of the awful herxheimers. 

I'm not sure why I felt the need to add 30 seconds on that last trip. I guess partly because my ND wants me doing something like 7 minutes a day, and partly because I'm fiercely determined and partly because I didn't think it would make that much of a difference. Wow, was I ever wrong and I have such regrets about making that decision. Mostly because I missed out on a Lammas ritual that I was really looking forward to on Saturday night. I had thought: tired Wednesday, icky on Thursday and Friday, energy rush and good to go on Saturday. But those 30 seconds cost me 3 days of activity and I'm still paying for it in the pain department with these weird, breath-taking, shooting pains in my fingers, toes, head and hips and the RLS (restless leg syndrome) has brought me to the verge of tears a few nights.

That treatment was last Wednesday. Today is Tuesday and I'm just now getting the energy rush I expected. My next Rife date is tomorrow and I'll be dropping back down to 3:33. I still have not been able to increase the A-Bart, but I'm OK with that. 4 drops a day is A-OK. I'm thoroughly exfrighted - I'm ordering my Rife machine today. I have raised some money on the GoFundMe website and my mom mailed a check to me to reimburse me for travel expenses. The combo is about $100 more than the machine, so I'm doing it!! I can't believe it. Surreal. Exciting. My next appointment with my ND is on the 12th and my MD, not until September. Although I'm impatient and want to get on with it, at least I can actually DO something with the Rife while I await my next appointment. Sweet.

And finally, now I'm curious why Latvia is taking the lead in my blog readers this week. If anyone from Latvia is willing to post a comment, please do. Let me know what is happening in the culture of TBDs and the medical scene where you are.

If you want to help

In earlier posts, I've mentioned a handful of dear friends who offered to spearhead a fundraiser for me to get a Rife machine, re-mediate our mold problem and recoup some of my crazy medical costs over the last 18 months. Well, we finally launched the website and if you're inclined to make a donation, it's just a couple of clicks away.

While this is making me wildly uncomfortable - asking for money - I feel like I owe it to my spouse to ease his burdens while I get to have the best health care possible guilt-free. If I can just successfully swallow (and digest! I know all-too-well how important THAT is!) my pride, I think it's a win-win situation.

Thanks to my fundraising team for gently prodding me, encouraging me, loving me, and making this easier. You're amazing!!

Donate here if you are so inclined. My partner and I would greatly appreciate any gift, no matter the amount.

Rife Date #4

So here's the pattern:

I have a Rife session and feel pretty wiped out for the day by the time I get home

The next 2 days I herx, including old symptoms I haven't had for awhile 

Sometime on the 3rd day, I get a crazy blast of energy like I haven't felt for years. While it doesn't last very long, I've noticed it lasts a little longer each time I use the Rife machine.

At this point, twice a week is all I can physically afford to do since this treatment basically takes 3 days. I am so very grateful we've had an amazing cool streak because we haven't needed the A/C much and I've been able to stay indoors while herxing so I can stay close to my bed and the loo. That's been an incredible gift.

I'm still distressed over the pain in my hands and hips. I have to medicate to be able to type or otherwise use my hands. I don't know why it seems to be getting worse unless it's the soy in my smoothie protein powder. I know soy can be inflammatory and I haven't noticed a problem with it before. However, I'll try switching it out and see if that makes a difference.

The new doctor is willing to take me on as a Lyme patient and I am so grateful! My PCP said she was willing to take over the prescriptions I was getting from Dr. Jaller (the Lyme doc in Maryland) so I think I'm good to make the switch! Yay!! 

I will call Dr. Jaller's office and let them know what's happened and that I'm switching. I really hope he takes an interest in my case and is able to help other people suffering by learning from what is helping me. He's a pretty cool guy that way. I'm mentioning him by name because he's gone into private practice and is no longer accepting insurance so he's able to treat Lyme and TBD's openly and without worry of harassment. What a nutty business this is. How many doctors will make this choice before the government wakes up to this crisis?

I believe his protocol works for a lot of people and I highly recommend him in the Rockville, MD area. His new website is http://www.drjaller.com/and it looks great and oh-so-welcoming to people suffering from this freakish disease. I owe him a major debt of gratitude and will thank him profusely for all he's done for me.

OK, Peeps, one last thing; I am curious about the people in Russia reading my blog. I recently heard in the Lyme news that TBD's are being diagnosed more and more in Russia. If you're in Russia and have information to share, please post a comment or send a message. I'd love to hear from you!

Who's the Clever Boots?

That would be me! I feel quite proud of my ingenuity and medical experiments on myself. Although I'm doing two new things at once (addressing the air quality in my house and using the Rife machine) I'm pretty sure I can tell what impact each one is having on my health and both are positive and give me hope!

About the Indoor Environment

First, let me just say it's not easy getting A/C people to come out for an estimate in their busy season. I still don't have an appointment. I realized I wasn't going to be able to sleep in the tent during the heatwave nor in the house, so after laughing about that for awhile, I started surfing the web. Surely other people out there have figured out cheaper efficient ways of dealing with this stuff and sure enough, here's what I found out.

Air filtration was very high on the list of things that worked for people with environmental allergies. From what I could gather, one of the best types of filter is a HEPA (high-efficiency particulate air.) It claims to remove particles up to .2 microns which covers dust, mold, pollen, animal dander, etc. Here's a Wikipedia link if you'd like to read more: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HEPA

I headed out of the house and had a frustrating search, often the case in our small town. Staples didn't have the right combination of size and filtration for an affordable price so I went to Wal-Mart (which is a last resort but that's another rant.) I read all of the information on every box in both stores and was about to surrender when I noticed something. I found a Holmes aer1 unit that was the perfect size for my room and it had a "HEPA-type" filter. It bugged me that I couldn't get exactly what I wanted so I just stood there reading boxes to see if there was anything I overlooked. I glanced up at the top shelf where the filter replacements were housed and started reading those boxes. I landed on one that was a HEPA filter "aer1 ready!" Oh, joy!!! For about $30, there were 2 HEPA replacement filters in the box, each lasting one year. The aer1 unit was around $40. It has the option of ionizing the air but also clearly stated the hazards, cautions and safest way to use the ionizer.  I dashed home and plugged it in, cranked it up and went back outside to let it do it's thing. My partner rigged a way for the cats to get in and out with the door closed (so there's another Clever Boots!) I've had the unit on 24/7 for a week and boy can I tell the difference!! Dare I say this debilitating nausea may be at its end? Knock wood. I sure I hope so! Although this filter certainly isn't the long-term solution, I now know it's worth addressing the mold issues in the HVAC. It won't be a waste of money. For now, I'm confined to my room most of the time I'm indoors. Otherwise, I start to get a little nauseous and can feel the beginnings of acid reflux. It's very weird. What a relief to know this! WOOT! 

3rd Rife Session

I went to Carol's the day before yesterday for another Rife treatment. I decided to increase my time from 2 minutes to 3 1/2. My ND recommends I get up to 7 minutes a day but that will be a bit down the road. I enjoyed her company and deeply appreciate her willingness to share. It's wonderful and I can't wait to do the same for others. What a lovely thing to be able to offer people. I'm thinking of doing a super quick fundraiser for just the Rife machine and another campaign later to work on the medical costs that are putting us in the hole. I'm so ready, willing, needful, almost desperate for this machine. I feel more optimistic than I have in a very long time and as I expressed earlier, it's a bit of a drive to do twice a week, especially since I'm ultimately aiming for daily use.

So the YayBoo (that's one of our household deities we created) is that I had a wallop of a herx yesterday. I felt ridiculously intoxicated - slurred speech, wobbly gait, forgetful - had a good load of pain and oddly, the recurrence of 2 symptoms I haven't had for a long time: tinnitus in my left ear and RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) all freaking night long. UGH!! I really hate that one, but I was also really excited to see that symptom come back. It makes me think the Rife machine really got in there deep and that is majorly exciting! After hours of this agonizing bout with RLS, I finally got up at 2 a.m. and took the homeopathic remedy for RLS and a sleeping aid and managed almost 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep. I'm feeling pretty whacked today, but also excited. I need to drink LOTS of water and be very good to myself. 

And last note for today, I see my lovely family doctor tomorrow and she will see if I've been making antibodies to the pneumonia vaccine. I'm curious about all of that for sure. 

P.S. Unsolicited Advice: Smile at people today and notice if you make others smile and if you just feel better in general. I think it's good, fun, effective therapy and the world can always use a little more joy.



 

At least I'm still laughing!

I'll start my post today with a big shout out of gratitude to my parents. I could give an endless list of reasons I'm grateful for them, but the one shining forth so brightly these days is humor. I am so happy to be able to laugh at myself and life in all it's weirdness.

So, I've been experimenting getting away from the A/C as much as possible and it does seem to make a real difference in terms of my nausea, but not the rest of the TBD symptoms. In fact, I'm having an increase in symptoms and don't know if that is the effect of the Rife machine, the heat, too much A-Bart, or something else. I've been getting outside first thing in the morning and staying on the screened porch or when I need to lie down, my friend's tent. Here's where it gets laughable.

The summer heat is finally supposed to set in for the week (it's been unseasonably cool and rainy) with a wallop of humidity. The A/C people won't be here for a few days to give us a quote and I don't know how much longer after that before we actually get the coil replaced. So what's a tick bit chick to do? Too much heat can create sheer HELL for a Lymie, as some of you have probably found out the hard way, like I did. Heat can kill off loads of bacteria and cause a mighty herx reaction. Yet, the A/C might try to drive me back to the ER and I'm definitely not into that!

Perhaps I need to take a friend up on her offer of staying at her house until we have a new coil and filter (apparently a Merv 13 is the bombdiggity, but who knew?) However, that also feels just weird. 

Now just a quick note on the Lyme stuff, the night sweats are back which is a total bummer, I'm often crazy dizzy and off balance, the fatigue is seemingly unbearable at times, I'm so tired of being tired, and the pain in my hands and lower extremities is often debilitating for long periods of time. (Another reason why my email is so backed up and I rarely go on Facebook. It hurts.)

I have canes everywhere and for all occasions and they've been getting a work out lately. I've started my symptom tracking again. I know it's important but I've been letting it slide because it's freakin' depressing to look at, day in and day out. 

I've contacted the new doctor to see if she'll take me on in the midst of my disability case and if she'll take over some of the symptom management drugs I currently get from my doctor in MD. I'd like to make the switch. We'll see what she says. Those drugs are:

cyproheptadine - an antihistamine that stimulates the appetite
ondansetron ODT - an anti-nausea drug
dexilant 60 mg - an acid reflux drug
marinol - to help with nausea and appetite stimulation (I'm still undecided if I want to use this one or not. I think for me it would be great to have for emergencies but not for every day use. It makes me wicked tired and I don't need that!)

Finally, I heard from the immunologist yesterday and so far, the blood tests point toward his theory that I'm in 3% of the population that is a "normal variant," but that we'd know for sure after the blood test to check my antibodies for pneumonia, which will happen when I see my GP next week.

Alright, peeps. I think that's all for now. If laughter is the best medicine, I should be well on my way to wholeness.